When you’re knee-deep in nappies and haven’t slept for days, it’s hard to feel like a leader. In fact, it’s difficult to feel like you’re even in charge of your own life. With the birth of your little one, your sense of autonomy, freedom and control goes out the window.

Or does it?

We’d like to introduce to you the idea that motherhood and leadership are in fact very closely intertwined.

But before we explore why that’s true we’d like to talk about what leadership actually is.

What is leadership?

The Oxford Dictionary describes leadership to be “The action of leading a group or an organisation”. But a leader is also a person who brings people together and guides them towards a shared goal. Anyone can tell people what to do but true leadership requires so much more than that. True leadership is about inspiring people, not forcing them. Can you see the correlation now? Our most memorable moments as mothers are usually the ones that happen when we can take a step back and inspire our family to work together as a team and live lives to their fullest.

If you’re doubting the idea that you are the leader of your family, just contemplate these questions for a while:

What would happen in your household if you weren’t around?

Who would your children become if you weren’t around?

What would get done if you weren’t around?

These questions may even make you chuckle as you imagine the chaos that would ensue without your influence. But hopefully, reflecting on these questions has made you realise just how much of an impact you have on your family and how important you are to their wellbeing.

So let’s take a look at ways you can embrace leadership and lead like an empowered mama.

Ways to lead like an empowered mama

As mums, we don't get to choose our kids. They are who they are. Our job is not to change or mould them but to raise them in a way that supports them to be the best versions of themselves. As motivational speaker and writer Tony Robbins says, a leader is “Someone who inspires others to become more of who they truly are.”

And we lead the way by understanding our own gifts and strengths and being who we truly are!

So let’s take a look at how mamas can lead their families:

Identifying your gifts and strengths. What gifts and strengths do you have that support you to lead your family? Be really specific. Is it your kindness and generosity? Your empathy and emotionality? Your problem-solving skills or organisational skills? Remember that leadership is about offering your unique skills to bring out the best outcome. It’s not about being the best at everything.
Lean into vulnerability. Vulnerability can be challenging for most people and is tied to the biggest lie of all; vulnerability is weak. Being vulnerable is the most courageous thing you can do, for yourself, your family and those around you. It takes courage and strength to show up as your true self. You do not have to appear like you have it all together, because no one does! Be real and remember that there is no such thing as a perfect parent. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable with your kids and show them that you don’t always have the answer.
Don’t shy away from failure or protect your kids from failure. Teach them that it’s OK to fall down. The important thing is to get up and try again. And the best way to teach them to be OK with failure is by setting an example in your own life. How can you see failure as an opportunity for learning and growth?
Don’t shy away from taking charge and making decisions. Saying “Wait until dad gets home” can be disempowering and takes away your own strength in the family. Of course, there are definitely decisions you need to make as a team, but be discerning about which decisions you need your partner for and which ones you can make on your own.

Teach your kids to ask for what they want and need. Let your kids know that what they think and feel matters and that they should use their voices and ask for what they want. You can teach them this by asking others for what you want and need.

Help your kids find greatness. How can you show your kids to be who they really are? How can you support them to be the truest expression of themselves? What do they love to do? What lights them up? How can you support their growth and help them follow their dreams?
Work together. Even though we’re encouraging you to find your sense of leadership, remember that you and your family are all in this together. Everyone is a leader in their own life. Part of leadership is inspiring others to also become leaders. Leadership doesn’t mean doing all the work and it doesn’t only mean delegating work. Leadership is about working together where everyone contributes their own unique gifts.

Final thoughts

Some people would say that you are either born with leadership qualities or you’re not. We disagree. We believe that leadership can be learned and practised. We hope that every mama sees their leadership potential and believes in themselves enough to make a huge impact on the lives of those around them.

Embracing leadership: How do I lead like an empowered mama?

It's not always the easiest role to assume. Unii can help.