During a coffee date with a close friend and fellow parent, the conversation turns to mealtimes. It would seem that your friend’s family is attempting to sit and eat together once a day. Knowing how difficult your kids can be when it comes to food, and how picky, messy, and naughty they become, you can’t help but think to yourself, what a horrible idea!

And while we understand this attitude, we believe there really are genuine benefits to sitting down and eating together as a family.

Why is it a good idea to eat and sit together?

A study involving almost 100,000 kids showed that those who sat down together with their families at mealtimes were less likely to use alcohol and tobacco, were half as likely to develop depression or an eating disorder, and had better attendance records at school. We can probably attribute these benefits to the fact that sitting together leads to more conversation and therefore improved relationships.

So, the benefits seem to be fairly substantial. Unfortunately, if family meals haven’t been a priority in the past, it can be tricky to suddenly introduce them, and it will almost certainly take some time. So, how do you go about it?

How can I make family meals a regular occurrence in my household?

We’ve put together some tips for making family meals a regular occurrence in your household:

It doesn't need to be over dinner. For some families, sit-down dinners just aren’t a possibility, and during lunchtime, the kids are typically at school. So, consider making breakfast your family meal. If that won’t work, aim for some together time before the kids go to bed. Have a think about what might best suit your family and then set up a schedule.

Create a schedule and a structure for mealtimes. Once you have a rough idea of when the family meal will take place, give everyone plenty of warning beforehand and try to work out what you’ll be cooking and at what time. The more prepared you are, the more you can focus on enjoying your family’s company (and keeping the kids at the table).

Make up your own rules. Every family’s mealtime should work for them, so make up your own rules. It could be that the kids must sit down with at least one adult a day, and that adult could be you, your partner, your mum, or the babysitter. Perhaps you’ll decide to do family breakfasts twice a week or a pizza party every Saturday evening. It might be that your rules are only established once you’ve begun to implement family mealtimes. Whatever the case, once they’ve been established, try to keep them up!

Getting everyone to sit down together for 5 minutes is still an achievement. If family meals are new to your family, don’t expect perfection the very first time you try, because the chances are it won’t be pretty. While it will get better over time, celebrate even the short bursts of togetherness and try to see them as a win.

If you have a partner, try to get on the same page and contribute equally if possible. Some people grow up eating at the table with their family and feel that it’s the most natural thing in the world, while others just can’t understand the point. Whatever schedule you end up settling on, work with your partner to not only make meals easier, but also more enjoyable, and not a battle of wills.

Use meal planning apps, meal kits, or order a takeaway. It’s not always easy to cook a meal that caters to every member of your family, especially with picky kids, so don’t feel bad if ordering a pizza is the only way to get your family to sit and eat together. Meal planning apps and meal kits can also make the planning and preparation processes a little easier.

Enjoy mealtimes! Once you’ve settled into a routine, make sure you’re having fun. Talk with your family, ask your kids questions, tell funny jokes, and discuss interesting topics. Make the most of this time together!

How can I make family meals a regular occurrence?