Preparing your mental health for conception is not something everyone has time to do. Almost 45% of UK pregnancies are unplanned, for example, and once conception has happened, engaging with your early pregnancy care and perinatal mental health will become your top priority. However, many preconception journeys are emotionally and psychologically challenging, particularly for the maternal partner, and there are some simple things you should do to prepare yourself if you can. Preparing your mind for pregnancy is just as important as taking care of your body.

Eat better (and take your prenatal vitamins).

Eating well is as important for your mental health as it is for your body when you are trying to conceive. Stress, for example, is known to impact fertility, and the diet directly affects the structure and function of your brain and therefore your ability to regulate your mood. A diet high in refined sugars impairs brain function and worsens symptoms of anxiety and other mood disorders. Conversely, a healthy and balanced diet nourishes the brain and protects its cells from oxidative damage, promotes good sleep, helps to stabilise your mood and hormones, and gives you adequate fuel for regular exercise.

Avoid drugs and alcohol.

You should be cutting these substances out for the health of any future pregnancy, but drugs and alcohol can impact your mental health so negatively that this one bears repeating. There is no established safe level of either for pregnant women. In addition, you should discuss any supplements or natural remedies you are taking with your doctor to ensure they are safe for pregnancy and right for your health in general. Food supplements and natural over-the-counter products are not regulated as strictly as pharmaceuticals, and we cannot always be certain how they are affecting our bodies.

Know your cycle.

Understanding your menstrual cycle means you can check when you’re ovulating and time sex for conception. It can also help you predict the day when your mood will be that bit lower and to plan for extra self-care accordingly. Premenstrual syndrome tends to happen in the ten to fourteen days before your period starts and lifts around day two, but every woman is different. All of this timing is dependent on your cycle being fairly regular. If you have irregular periods, investigating why can be extremely important to your preconception journey.

Ensure that any mental health medications or treatments you receive are up-to-date

You will hopefully have been asked about your mental health and any medications you might be taking at your preconception checkup. Anyone planning a pregnancy with a serious mental health problem will require specialist help from the beginning. It’s important to be completely transparent about your medical history with anyone looking after you during preconception and pregnancy. In addition, infertility can both cause and be caused by mental health problems, so it’s important to ensure you or your partner are seeking the appropriate treatment.

Exercise appropriately

Exercise has an important impact on mental health, not least because it helps to regulate our hormones, appetite, and sleep. There are so many ways to work out safely in preconception. We cannot recommend this highly enough. As long as you’re not a fan of HIIT classes, boxing, skiing, or anything else that’s high intensity, contact-based, or likely to cause injury (especially to your abdomen), go with what you love and do it at least two and a half hours a week.

Avoid social media.

Avoiding Instagram, X, etc. may not be easy, especially given how many of us need to be on social media for professional reasons, but avoiding other people’s pregnancy announcements and baby photos can be important to your mental health if you are struggling to conceive. You also don’t need any self-comparison to happy pregnant couples, especially if you are planning to have a baby by yourself. In addition, some research ties social media to regularly disrupted, decreased, and delayed sleep. This can exacerbate mood problems and stress.

Practise self-care

Self-care should be a top priority for anyone planning a baby and should include protecting yourself from other people’s horror stories about fertility, pregnancy, and birth. While it is generous of others to share their stories and important for anyone who has experienced trauma to talk, you do not need this information at this time in your life. Their stories will never be yours. Your path to preconception is unique. If you have a hard time protecting yourself from other people’s perspectives in daily life, you may like to don the Cloak of Protection described by Unii Hypnobirthing Expert Tamara Cianfini. While this tool is recommended on her Hypnobirthing Journey for shielding pregnant women from any negativity about labour and childbirth, it can be just as effective in helping you to shake off any sad fertility stories. Hypnobirthing techniques are transferable to many areas of life that cause anxiety, and it’s never too early (or late!) to learn Tamara’s relaxations.

Get adequate sleep.

Getting enough sleep regularly is an often overlooked element of preconception care in our busy lives, especially if you are concerned about funding assisted treatment options and need to take on extra work. Good sleep (seven to eight hours every night) is proven to aid conception, whether you’re trying to have it happen naturally or investing in reproductive technologies. Inadequate sleep and erratic sleep patterns negatively impact our reproductive hormones, energy levels, eating habits, and mental health.

Give yourself enough time for recovery between pregnancies

Short intervals between pregnancies are linked to a number of physical and mental health problems in mothers, including perinatal depression. It is not always possible to plan your pregnancies, but a nineteen-month break between them is recommended.

Find your village

Couples or individuals who are trying to conceive babies need support. It doesn’t have to be a huge crew, but a number of people you trust that you can reach out to when you need them will make you feel better just knowing they’re around. We are all humans. Sometimes you need someone to remind you not to take a pregnancy test on a day you know it’s going to be negative. Sometimes you need someone to tell you to take care of yourself better or take some time out. There is no need to isolate yourself in this situation, and you will be glad you created a community for yourself when you do become pregnant. If you have someone close to you who is struggling with fertility issues or undergoing fertility treatment, try to remind them of your admiration of their strength and find ways to celebrate small milestones. It will hopefully come back to you tenfold when you’re trying.

Watch Unii's Preconception Journey video course with award-winning obstetrician and gynaecologist Dr. Shree Datta for more information to support you as you try to get pregnant.

How can I prepare my mental health for conceiving a baby?

Unii looks at managing your mind while trying to get pregnant.