Choosing your baby's name can be exceedingly difficult. Do you go with a family name? Stick with trends so he or she won’t sound weird during roll call? And what about how names can potentially influence employment opportunities and unconscious bias later in life? Unii looks at how a choice that should be joyful can wind up keeping you awake at night. We hope to make your life a bit easier. Narrowing your choices to a list of options can be a nice way to begin. Let's ask some questions that get you one.

How many names do you want your baby to have?

How many names are you choosing? Will your child have one or multiple middle names? Two Christian or first names? A double-barrelled last name?

Having the entire family share a last name can make life (and administration) easier, but some women feel they are letting their family down or even betraying their feminist beliefs if this last name is their male partner’s. The British barrister Dr. Charlotte Proudman posits that babies should carry their mother’s last name in recognition of what she goes through during labour, which billions of mums would surely smile about if not agree with outright.

Some in-laws may be upset if either last name is ignored, especially if there are no other grandchildren on their side. You may remember the harrowing dinner scene from Father of the Bride Part 2 where the young couple suggests making up a new name that is a portmanteau of their family names to avoid favouring either side unfairly. The in-laws reactions are not positive.

If you are lucky enough to come from a country like Spain, where extensive names that recognise both partners' families are common, this is not a discussion that will bother you too much, though for administrative purposes your child’s father’s names will probably be used most often. Once you know how many names you need to choose and what your baby’s surname will be, checking how the whole thing looks and sounds becomes far easier.

Don’t forget family names.

The death of a beloved family member close to the birth of your child can come with an expectation you will pass that name on to them. Some families also have names that tend to be used across the generations, which makes the naming of your first boy or girl much easier if you and your partner agree that this should continue. Some parents believe strongly in the way that birth order shapes personality and may adapt the father’s name for the firstborn and the mother’s for the second-born. For Christians, godparents are typically close family members or friends who are chosen because they will play a significant role in a baby’s life after baptism, and as a result, their name may be selected as a middle name.

Check how your favourite baby names elide with your chosen surnames.

The way a name sounds can be crucial. Alliterative names, as so often favoured by writers like Aaron Sorkin when christening characters, can look and sound engaging. You will want to avoid names that rhyme or sound ridiculous in some other way. The way any potential name’s initials and abbreviations look and sound are also worth testing. Your baby will have their name for a very long time and hopefully will never want to be known by one that is not on their birth certificate.

Look at recent records of the most popular baby names where you live.

What was the most popular boys' name last year in the country where you’re going to raise your child? And the most popular girls'? We’re not suggesting that you copycat, but understanding how the wind is blowing can ensure your child’s name won’t be too different from those they encounter in education. This can be especially important to parents whose peers gave them a hard time at school. Plus, let’s not forget how important it was to simply fit in when you were at school. In the UK, the Office for National Statistics has a Baby Name Explorer that allows you to check the top 100 most popular names as far back as 1904, which could make for some inspiring comparisons with your grandparents’ generation.

Use a name that means something to you.

On the other hand, some couples find that a particular word or place name has more meaning for them than traditional names. This might be behaviour you associate with celebrities. That doesn’t mean you can’t name your child after a favourite month or city if they take your fancy, though April and Clare are likely to raise fewer questions than September and Detroit as your child makes their way in the world. Similarly, giving a child a concept or cause-based name can be poetic and memorable—Saoirse, Kanye, etc.—but quite burdensome if you make it too political or highbrow. Striking a balance now will save your child a lot of explanation later.

Making a traditional name meaningful doesn’t have to be about family. Whether you choose something from the Bible or some other holy text, most first names originate from some positive sentiment, and choosing them can symbolise a wish for your child. For example, Alexander comes from a Greek compound of the verb “to defend” and the noun “men” and has historic associations with leadership.

Consider whether you want your baby’s gender and heritage to be clear.

Name bias in recruitment is, unfortunately, a very real phenomenon. Your name choice can tell potential employers and everyone else about their gender, heritage, and level of education, which may be considered a predictor of your investment in their education. Some parents may feel they should give girls gender-neutral names and boys traditional Anglo names in order to play into affinity or conformity biases. However, with an increasing number of organisations engaging in name-blind recruitment, you could also just call your baby whatever you want and have faith that the world of work is moving in a less discriminatory direction.

Wait until you meet your baby.

First-time parents may not realise that their baby arrives as a total individual, and a name that sounded perfect during pregnancy may not suit your newborn at all. This is why a list of agreed names is so much better than an absolute choice. One final word of advice: do not tell other people what you want to call your baby before you've done it. They'll express an opinion of that name (even it's just a facial expression), that may colour your own feelings about it. And then it's right back to the drawing board...

For more advice on taking care of yourself in pregnancy, labour, and birth, check out Unii’s Antenatal Classes, with prenatal video episodes taught by senior NHS midwives, an award-winning obstetrician and gynaecologist, and six other leading healthcare experts. Only at unii.com.

For more advice on planning for your baby’s arrival, check out Unii’s Giving Birth Journey video course with Dr. Keith Duncan.

How do I choose the right name for my baby?

Jennifer, Alison, Philipa, Su? How do you choose the right name for your baby? Unii has some ideas.