It’s been 8 months since you first started trying to get pregnant. At times, it’s been a disappointing journey, filled with both excitement and tears for you and your partner.

But a few months ago, the moment you had both been waiting for finally arrived - a positive pregnancy test, followed by a big smile and a thumbs up from your doctor!

You always imagined that you could barely wait a day to tell all your family and friends about your exciting news. But now the news has actually become a reality, you’re wondering how best to go about the announcement.

We know that telling your social circle about your pregnancy can feel very daunting. So, we’re here to give you some advice on how best to go about it.

Here are some things to remember when telling your nearest and dearest about your exciting news:

Remember that some of your friends or family might react differently from how you expect. When it comes to your immediate social circle, prepare for different reactions. While some may squeal with excitement and joy, others may react with significantly less joy. Remember, if your friends are also in their reproductive years, they may also be going through their own conception or pregnancy difficulties or experiences. If you feel your friends’ reaction to your pregnancy has let you down, you may want to communicate this to them. However, it’s healthy to accept that not everyone can share your excitement with you for reasons of their own.

Prepare for friends to react with an edge of competition. Although we’re not excusing any bad behaviour, remember that some of your friends may react slightly bitterly towards your news. It’s not that they’re not happy for you, but your pregnancy may contribute to them feeling inadequate or left behind, especially if they’re not in the same stage of life as you, or if they’ve just suffered a miscarriage, for example. Try not to take this personally, and be empathetic towards your more sensitive or vulnerable friends where possible. This might mean telling some of them in a less public way such as through text message, or in private.

Review your company’s maternity leave policy before telling your boss. Before telling your boss about your pregnancy, you may find it helpful to review your company’s maternity policy. This way, you’ll be more able to handle any difficulties you may come across with regards to the technicalities surrounding your maternity leave.

Wait for the right time to tell your boss. In addition to reviewing your company’s policy before telling them about your pregnancy, you might also find it helpful to wait until you’ve passed the higher-risk window of the first trimester or screening tests. This will help you feel more in control and able to face any challenging questions about your maternity leave.

Here are a few extra tips for telling your boss about your pregnancy:

Come prepared and know what to ask. This will eliminate any anxiety you feel approaching the conversation.

Don’t have this conversation on the fly - schedule the meeting for a quiet part of the day.

Be empathetic - remember the news may create a challenge for your workplace and may impact others.

Take work off his/her plate - for example, provide some suggestions about who should take on your work tasks or roles once you’re gone.

Give yourself some wiggle room. Remember that it’s ok not to have all the answers yet.

Always protect yourself. If you find your boss becomes angry or unpleasant, then try to stay calm, and give yourself time to figure out how you should respond. If you’re worried that they might try to fire you without cause, speak to your HR department and seek legal advice.

How do I go public with my pregnancy?

How to share that you're expecting, according to Unii.