How does my early toddler explore by walking and talking?

You walk into the living room to see that your favourite book has been torn to shreds. You instantly know who the culprit is – your newly walking toddler!

Seeing your baby take their first steps is an exciting milestone that you’ll never forget. You may have noticed that since your little one has discovered this newfound ability, they just can’t get enough! They suddenly see the world from a whole new angle, which encourages them to keep exploring how to use their eager little legs again and again. They fall, they get up, they fall down again and up they get, never tiring of practising this exhilarating new skill. But unfortunately, you now have to keep anything that’s precious to you above three feet!

Just as walking is a momentous achievement in a child’s life, so is the naming of important things in the world, which usually occur at the same time. For your toddler, the joy of exploring meaning through words can be just as exhilarating as the joy of exploring a new world through walking.

Let’s take a look at what to expect from your toddler as they explore walking and talking.

What does exploring walking and talking look like?

At first, your toddler is oblivious to knocks and falls and will keep trying to master this skill again and again. Walking and talking give your toddler newfound confidence and security. Exhilaration is a key mood at this time.
Eager to try out their eager little legs and hands, your toddler will now climb on anything they can; your dresser, your work desk, even the fireplace.
At this age, your child first recognises themselves and everyone else in the mirror and points out everyone’s body parts; e.g. “mummy’s nose” and “daddy’s ears”. They also become quite obsessed with their genitals and will usually give them a name.

Toddlers love to run off again and again, so they can enjoy being chased and picked up by their parent. This is a symbolic game for toddlers that reassures them they will not be abandoned as they practise this new skill.

When you are there to witness your toddler, they feel elated. When you leave, they will likely protest by clinging to you, resisting separation. During your absence, your child will likely become more sombre trying to remember a memory of when you were present. Their motivation to keep exploring, walking and talking significantly diminishes. At this point in your child’s development, they have not yet learnt that “out of sight” means “out of mind” so they need to work extra hard to conjure up a memory of you through their imagination.

Your child may react in a variety of ways on your return. Your child may burst into tears to relieve any pent-up tension, or maybe they will act defiantly by trying to “pick a fight” with you. Or you may even find that your toddler continues to play as if nothing happened and ignores you once you return. These responses reflect your child’s unique way of expressing their anger at you leaving them.

If your child appears ambivalent to your absence, it is likely they are protecting themselves, so they do not have to feel the discomfort and disappointment of separation again. You can help to ease this reaction by letting them know you are just leaving for a moment but will be back soon. Continue to shower them with affection even if your child is purposely turning away from you.
More often than not, toddlers will be happy about your return and greet you joyfully, showing that they are able to manage this temporary separation. This greeting can look like a smile, or showing you a toy or insisting that you pick them up. This reaction shows that your child trusts that you’re available to them even when you leave them temporarily.

Now let’s look at how you can support your child as they explore how to walk.

How to support your child in exploring walking?

Although the game of running to pick up your little one may seem like a tiring and endless tease to you as a weary parent, this game is essential to your toddler who needs to feel reassured as they explore their independence.

When your toddler falls down and hurts themselves, ending in tears instead of giggles, it’s important to retrieve your child in a supportive and reassuring manner. This teaches your child it is safe to go beyond their limits.

If you and your child are too attached to each other, your child may rebel and become moody and uncooperative. It’s important that your child does not become too dependent on you and is allowed to have the freedom to explore and do things by themselves.

Take your child’s emotional cues as a way to understand what they need. For example, if you help them too much, they may become angry. Allow your toddler to at least try to do things by themselves such as dressing and showering.

Try not to feel rejected when your little one ignores you or pushes you away. This is a good thing! It means that they want to try things by themselves. They are becoming more independent.
Your child needs a consistent message that they are strong and wise and do not need to depend on you. It’s important that we as parents withstand the discomfort of our children rejecting us, so we don’t end up rejecting them as retaliation. We need to teach them that they are strong without our help.

How does my young toddler explore by walking and talking?

Unii shares how your child understands the world after learning to walk and speak.