Breastfeeding can be a wonderful part of your relationship with your baby, and watching them grow and thrive on your milk is incredibly special. The breastfeeding relationship is unique to every mother and baby pair, and as such, how long it should last is also unique.

Breastfeeding is not a gift that you give your child (despite its many benefits) nor a sacrifice you make for them, but rather a relationship that you enter into with them. Once we frame it as a relationship, then it is more obvious that, like any healthy relationship, it is entered into with consent from both sides, continues for as long as both sides want, and should have positive benefits for both sides.

Any amount of breastfeeding that you want to have with your child has a benefit, so if it’s a relationship that you are interested in exploring, it is absolutely worth getting started, even if you change your mind early on. No mammal still breastfeeds beyond childhood, so when biologically would humans feed until?

Natural-term breastfeeding is what we call it when the breastfeeding relationship comes to a gradual stop when a child is ready with no external influences. We know that this happens for most children between 3 and 5 years of age. In most western societies today, this is no longer the norm, which means that the decision to wean often lies in the hands of the mother.

Weaning from the breast is what we usually call it when the mother is the one who has chosen to end the breastfeeding relationship. This is a valid choice, and the timing of this is a decision solely for the mother. It is not our place as breastfeeding professionals, families, or friends to judge whether that was ‘too soon’ or ‘too late’.

When you are considering weaning from the breast, think about why you’re doing it. If the decision comes from a positive place: ‘I’ve enjoyed our breastfeeding relationship, but now feels like the right time to move on to a new phase of parenting’ then, often, this is a decision that mum will look back on with confidence and happiness. However, when the decision comes from a negative place, ‘I really wanted to breastfeed longer, but I’m too sore, intense, or worried about weight gain..’ then often mums still struggle with that decision several years later. In these situations, getting some quality face-to-face support will allow you to either get to a more positive place in your breastfeeding relationship or feel more comfortable and confident in your decision to wean.

So, if you feel conflicted about whether to stop or extend breastfeeding, we’re here to help.

First of all, let’s dive into the benefits associated with extended breastfeeding.

What are the benefits associated with extending breastfeeding?

It’s a way for mother and child to continue bonding as the child grows. Breastfeeding is one of the most natural ways for a child to bond with its mother. It can help to regulate the big emotions felt in toddlerhood and provide connection.

Extended breastfeeding has been linked to secure attachment in children. Studies have also found that extending breastfeeding is linked to secure attachment in children, with other benefits such as contributing to the child being a lot more independent.

Breastfeeding continues to be nutritionally valuable. Although, at 12 months, about 70% of your child's calories (energy requirements) come from solid foods, there are still significant nutritional needs being met by breastfeeding. In the second year of life, 15oz (448 ml) of breastmilk provides:

29% of energy requirements
43% of protein requirements
36% of calcium requirements
75% of vitamin A requirements
76% of folate requirements
94% of vitamin B12 requirements
60% of vitamin C requirements

Dewey, 2001

Breastfeeding also gives mothers health benefits. Continued breastfeeding lowers the risk of certain cancers for mothers and also reduces their risk of developing type II diabetes.

Health authorities like the AAP, WHO, and NHS recommend These authorities recommend exclusive breastfeeding for the first 6 months and then continued breastfeeding alongside solids until 2 and beyond.

These benefits are significant, but like anything in life, there can be challenges to extended breastfeeding.

What are the challenges of extended breastfeeding?

Perceptions of others In many countries around the world, extended breastfeeding is no longer the norm. Some people lack understanding of the continued benefits of breastfeeding, and so many mothers come under pressure from family and friends to wean before they are ready.

Dental caries. This was often thought to be a challenge of extended breastfeeding. Although more research still needs to be carried out in this area, newer studies (Devenish et al. 2020) have concluded that breastfeeding practices are not associated with early childhood caries.

Delayed return of fertility. For some mothers, they won’t resume ovulating until they've fully weaned from the breast. This can be an issue for those wishing to extend their family. Be aware, though, that you can fall pregnant before your first period, so if extending your family is not in your plans, you will still need contraception.

Breastfeeding aversions and feeling ‘touched out' Some mothers do feel aversions as their child grows. Putting in boundaries and teaching your child about bodily autonomy can help with this.

When should breastfeeding stop?

For our Baby Feeding Journey, Unii Expert Wendy Lever explains when you can stop breastfeeding your baby.