Some parents will be experienced with newborns—either their own or someone else's—and others will hold a baby for the first time within weeks of taking an antenatal course. There are many things that will come naturally, but it can boost your confidence to pick up a few things in advance. Please note that the following advice is specific to newborn babies.

How do I lift and hold my baby?

Babies are quite resilient, but still need to be handled with care. The most important thing to remember is that their head is heavy. A newborn has no control over its neck muscles and will only begin to develop this at around four weeks, so it’s most important to support the head when lifting or holding. To pick your baby up, either lift him or her under the arms with your fingers behind her head or put one hand under her bottom and the other under her shoulders and head. To hold, move the baby against your shoulder, supporting the bottom with one hand and the head with the other. You could also cradle her in the crook of your arm. Although babies like to see your face when you hold them, you may find that they also like to be held face-down on your arm, with their head cradled in your open hand, facing outwards.

To safely put a baby down, hold them with one hand under the bottom and the other under the head and neck, then lower them gently. If you pick your baby up suddenly or unexpectedly, they may startle, fling their arms out, or cry. You can calm them by talking to them as you’re about to lift them.

How do I change a nappy?

Newborns need to be changed as many as ten or twelve times a day, so this is an important one. You don’t need to change your baby unless the nappy is heavy with wee, soiled, or has leaked. You will usually go through fewer disposable nappies daily than fabric nappies, but this shouldn’t discourage you from the more sustainable option. Have everything you need to hand, including wipes to clean your hands if you plan to use nappy cream. If you change your baby on a raised surface, stay with them at all times because it won’t be long before they can wriggle enough to move and fall.

To change the nappy:

Undo the old one and use it to wipe your baby off as much as possible. If you have a boy, you’ll find they pee right away, so have some tissues handy.

Clean your baby’s bottom thoroughly using water, cotton, wool, or wipes. Wipe from front to back with a baby girl to avoid spreading germs. You don’t need to clean inside a female baby’s labia or a male baby’s foreskin; just clean the areas you can get to easily. If things are very messy, wash the whole nappy area in a bowl of warm water.

Cream with zinc or castor oil can relieve symptoms of nappy rash and soothe chapped skin. Only use this with a reusable nappy, as it can reduce the absorbency of the disposable kind.

Dry your baby’s clean bottom and put on a fresh nappy.

How will I know if the contents of my baby’s nappy are normal?

It is hard to imagine, before becoming a parent, just how fascinating baby poo can be, but it is really a very good way of determining whether your baby is eating enough, among other important things.

It is normal for a baby’s poo to change colour in the first few weeks, going from meconium black to mustard yellow. Your baby’s first poo, meconium, will be sticky, tarry, and dark. It has built up in your baby’s intestines during pregnancy and can be hard to wipe. A good pro tip is to smooth Vaseline or Aquaphor over your baby’s bottom before putting on nappies for the first couple of days so that when they pass meconium, it’s easy to tissue off. A baby that does not pass meconium in the first twenty-four hours might have an obstruction, and this should be reported to your doctor or midwife.

In about 2–3 days, you should notice the meconium lighten to a greeny-yellow and become easier to clean. These poos are called ‘changing stools’ and they change because your baby is taking in more milk and digesting it. A baby who is not moving through these colour changes may not be getting enough milk. By the end of the first week, your baby’s poo is more yellow. By week two, it is usually mustard yellow. A formula-fed baby’s poo may be browner and will smell whiffier than that of an exclusively breastfed baby. The most significant change you’ll notice in the contents of your baby’s nappy after this stage is when you begin introducing solid food at around six months of age.

How often should my newborn wee and poo?

Newborns do an average of four poos a day in the first week of life. This goes down to an average of two a day by the time they're one year old. Breastfed babies may poo after each feed in the early weeks, then, after about six weeks, not have a poo for several days. Formula-fed babies may poo up to five times a day when newborn, but after a few months, as little as once a day.

It is also normal for babies to wince or even cry when doing poo. This isn’t a sign of constipation, though hard or bloody poos should be reported to your doctor or midwife.

Your new baby will produce around six wet nappies a day (you may be asked for numbers by your doctor or midwife if you need to speak to them, so it’s worth keeping track). These nappies should be heavy with clear or pale-yellow urine. If you are concerned that your baby is not getting enough milk, speak to your midwife.

Why is there blood and white discharge in my baby girl’s nappy?

This phenomenon is known as false menstruation and should stop in 3–4 days. It is caused by oestrogen that crosses the placenta to your baby in the womb. It sometimes occurs in the days after birth, but the hormones will soon disappear from her system. The nappies look alarming, but there is nothing to worry about.

How do I dress my baby?

Your newborn’s wardrobe will mainly consist of nappies, vests, and babygrows. If it is cold, try booties with elasticated ankles instead of socks. Newborns can rarely keep their socks on. To put on a vest, hold the neck wide open and gather up the rest of the fabric. Lift their head gently and put the back of the garment’s neck behind it, then lift the front of the vest up and over her face. Take each sleeve, open it wide, and reach through it to grasp your baby’s hand. Bring the sleeve over the hand and arm, pulling at the vest rather than the baby. Pull the body part of the vest down and fasten the poppers. For babygrows, spread the suit out with all the poppers undone. Lie the baby on top of it, put their legs into the suit, then gather up each sleeve and put them over your baby’s arms. Fasten the garment.

How do I keep my newborn clean?

You don’t really need to bathe your newborn during their first week at home. Tiny babies don’t get dirty very quickly generally, and “topping and tailing,” or keeping them clean with cotton wool and water, is perfectly fine until their first bath time. Always use different cotton wool balls for the face and genitals. Most newborns don’t seem to like being unclothed, and you may as well minimise the trauma by keeping bathtimes infrequent and just them wherever they need it. You don’t need soap or bath liquid for this, but if you want to use them, do make sure they’re specially formulated for newborns. Just wash what you can easily get out, and don’t be worried about your baby’s fontanelles; they are tougher than they look, and you can wash the head in the same way you would any other part of them.

When your baby does need a bath, there’s no need to buy one. A washing-up bowl will do. Or you can even use your bathroom sink with a hand towel wrapped around the taps for safety. Have everything to hand before you begin, as you will need to hold on to the baby and support their head at all times. Test the water’s temperature with your elbow to ensure it’s comfortably warm. Again, any washes or soaps must be baby-friendly.

Dry your baby thoroughly, especially in the skin’s creases and folds, as these can get sore. Avoid talc, as this may clog the pores and get into the baby’s airways.

How do I swaddle my baby?

Newborns love to be swaddled; if you can imagine the snug environment of the uterus, you won’t be surprised to see how happy they are to feel all tucked in. They’re born with a natural ‘Moro reflex’ that makes their arms fly out to the sides, often about 30 minutes after they’ve gone to sleep. This wakes them up, sometimes with startled crying, and swaddling can stop it from happening.

To swaddle your baby:

Take any large, breathable piece of cloth that’s not too thick and has some sort of ‘give.’

Lay the cloth on the floor and fold the top corner down.

Put your baby’s shoulders just under the folded edge.

Fold one side tightly over that arm and tuck it under the body on the opposite side.

Fold the bottom corner over the feet and tightly wrap the remaining side over the whole baby, tucking the edge under the baby.

Make sure the swaddle is tight on the arms but looser on the bottom half, allowing the legs to bend up and out at the hips like a frog’s legs. Many parents worry tight swaddling will harm their baby's hips and do it too loosely, so the baby wriggles out and wakes themselves up. As long as the material has some ‘give’ and you’ve kept the swaddle looser on the bottom, you’re not doing it too tightly. Current baby sleeping advice is to always lay your little one down to sleep on their back and avoid front or side positions, particularly when your baby is swaddled. You should stop swaddling your baby when they show the first signs of rolling over.

What are some practical skills I'll need to care for my newborn?