Our children are naturally inquisitive. This is not something that Unii or any parent wants to discourage: curiosity helps them learn and develop into well-adjusted young adults. However, a childhood fascination with fire that sparks unsupervised behaviour—whether it's lighting or playing with fires—is extremely dangerous. Children have a limited ability to grasp how quickly fire can spread beyond their control.

Without reprimands and good guidance, research has shown that as many as one in two children will go on to repeat their actions. Whether their behaviour is innocent experimentation or a sign of a mental health issue, it puts your whole family at risk.

Let’s look at what parents need to know in more detail.

Why is my child preoccupied with fire?

Curiosity is the most obvious reason, and a healthy desire to learn should be managed rather than discouraged. In addition, our understanding of fire-starting as taboo in Western culture may actually make it more compelling to a child (i.e., the more we prohibit something, the greater their interest), especially when fire is new to them. Older children may start fires because of anger or emotional distress. A fascination with fire has been linked to ASD and ADHD. Your child may be suffering from a psychiatric disorder, though pyromania is actually extremely rare in children. Serious medical causes require help that goes beyond the scope of our Unii Journey and should be professionally investigated without delay.

Children playing with and starting fires is more common than you might think, especially as experimenting often happens when adults are out of sight. Here are some signs that your child might be at risk:

Small burns on the carpets, clothes, or bedding.

Charred paper in sinks or bins.

Matches or lighters are concealed in your child’s room.

A noticeable interest in fires.

Unexplained burnt objects in the home or garden.

Signs of burns on windowsills.

The smell of smoke.

Deliberately starting or playing with a fire can cause serious damage to your home and property, as well as personal injury and even death. If you are worried about a child, it’s important to act.

What should I do if my child sets or plays with fire?

If your child has a genuine science-based interest, openly explaining fire’s characteristics and the many ways it helps people when used safely might be enough to curb their enthusiasm. If your little one is too young for this, there are child-friendly books that can help them understand the dangers and responsibilities involved with using fire in the home. However, in any case like this, it’s essential to explain that fire can do irreversible physical harm and even kill people.

Use age-appropriate language and examples relevant to your home and family to explain why they should stay away from fires of any kind. Explain that fire moves very fast and will hurt as soon as it touches them. Repeat warnings whenever possible. You may think what you say goes in one ear and out the other, but research shows children respond to repetition and reinforcement.

Stress that is only safe for adults to use matches or lighters.

Keep all matches and lighters out of sight and out of the reach of children.

Use child-proof lighters.

Never leave children alone in the house or in a room where there is a burning candle, an open fire, or a cooker on, even for short periods of time.

Carry out regular checks for the signs of firestarting that we mentioned above.

Keep garden sheds and garages locked to prevent access to flammable items.

Test your smoke alarms regularly, and make sure there is one in every room where a fire could start.

Set a good example! Always use fire sources—matches, lighters, candles, fireplaces, and campfires—in a safe manner. Never treat them as toys, or children may imitate you.

Talk with children about what their friends or other children are doing with fire. What are they seeing online in video games, on TV, in movies, and on social media? Teach them specific ways to resist peer pressure to misuse fire.

Don’t just chastise. Give praise for showing respect and age-appropriate, responsible behaviour towards fire.

Make an escape plan with your family and practice it.

A childhood preoccupation with fire is most likely a phase that will be outgrown, but the education you give them can be passed on to younger siblings and keeps the whole family safe, so is well worth your time and investment.

What do I do if my child is fascinated by fire?

Children's natural curiosity can be dangerous. Unii has expert advice.