How can I tell if my newborn's sleep is normal?

Expect your newborn to be absolutely exhausted right after birth. Birth is evidently an exhausting process. You’ll know that better than anyone! But as exhausting as it was for you, remember that your baby will also be pretty tired from the whole process, especially on the first night, and they will likely sleep for a straight 10 hours without needing to be changed or fed. Therefore, try to get as much rest and sleep for yourself as you can during this time.

The second night is where your baby’s appetite will likely kick in. During this time, your baby will be waking up at regular intervals to feed—potentially every one to two hours if they are breastfed, or two to three hours if they are formula-fed. This is because breast milk is more easily digested, so they are likely to become hungrier sooner. This will be a shock to your system, but you will get used to getting up regularly to tend to them.

Remember that your baby hasn’t yet developed their circadian rhythms. Circadian rhythms regulate the body clock, and a baby at this very early stage in life hasn’t yet developed theirs. Therefore, they won’t get any sleepier at night, as they don't yet understand the difference between day and night. This is why they will feed and nap the same, regardless of the time of day.

Your baby won’t be able to stay awake longer than 90 minutes at a time. If you’re worried that your baby won’t fall asleep, even if you’ve been trying to get them to for a long time, rest assured that they should fall back to sleep after an hour and a half at most in the early days.

Don’t worry about sleeping patterns during this time. Sleeping patterns are almost non-existent for a baby during this early stage—and subsequently for you, too! The longest period of time a baby is likely to sleep solidly during this period is around three hours. Even if you’re desperate for some sleep, you should be waking them every 4 hours to feed them until your little one is showing good weight gain. More than likely, though, they’ll be the ones waking you up, not the other way around.

Don’t be afraid to ask others for help. It’s very common for parents to want to do everything themselves when they have a baby. However, put your pride aside for now, as there’s absolutely no shame in asking for help! This might be as simple as asking a family member, close friend, or neighbour to pop around and cook you a meal or drop off something that is easy to heat up. You’ll be surprised at how much it helps.

What are the sleep expectations for babies in week 1?

Babies will typically sleep between 16 and 20 hours a day, but don’t be concerned if your baby sleeps a little less. You’ll no doubt know, or at least find out very soon, that their sleep schedule will be highly irregular, and you’ll be rather lucky if they sleep for 4 hours at a time. But don’t worry; soon enough, their sleep cycle will balance out, and you’ll get a few more much-needed hours for yourself!

How do I speed up my baby’s awareness of night and day?

At night, keep curtains closed and lights very dim during feedings. Though you may feel a bit unfriendly, don’t talk or make much eye contact with your baby (although you're probably too sleepy to interact much anyway). They’ll be comforted enough by your presence, so don’t worry. And during the day, try not to let them sleep for much more than 3 hours at a time, keep curtains open to let in the daylight, and don’t try to restrict ambient noise. So feel free to use the phone, watch a bit of TV, or put the washing machine on. Go about your daily business as usual. This will gradually teach their body and brain the various differences between night and day.

What are the sleep expectations for weeks 2 and 3?

At weeks 2 and 3, your baby needs between 14 and 17 hours of sleep a day, including naps, though their sleep is sure to be irregular, rarely lasting more than 3 hours at a time. Unfortunately, this means that your nights will remain rather sleepless, and your days might be a little hectic at times.

With this in mind, the ability to soothe your baby to sleep will likely seem more important than ever, even if some well-meaning relatives and friends tell you that this will cause sleeping issues in the future. They may tell you to let your baby cry themselves to sleep and learn to self-soothe, but we want you to ignore this advice.

But why is that?

Why shouldn’t I let my baby cry themselves to sleep?

At this stage, it’s far too early to be thinking about controlled crying (letting a baby cry themselves to sleep), and besides, parents have been rocking and soothing their babies to sleep for centuries for a reason—because it works.

So, how do you soothe and calm your little one so that they drift off to sleep?

How do I soothe my baby to sleep?

Rocking. Babies love a bit of movement to help them drift off because it reminds them of being inside the womb. Find a position you’re both comfortable with, most likely with their head on your shoulder or in the crook of your arm, and begin rocking gently back and forth. Even walking to and fro can do the trick. Have confidence that it will work eventually, and keep an eye on the clock. That way, you’ll soon realise that what feels like hours is in fact only a short 20 minutes.

Singing. Singing should calm the baby and even you! They’ll love the melodic tones of your voice and soon associate songs with sleep.

Shushing. Surprising as it is, shushing imitates the sound of pumping blood, which again reminds your baby of the womb. And if you’ve been woken up during the night and, as a result, you’re feeling a little frustrated, even a somewhat angry “shh shh shh” will sound comforting to your little one. White noise machines that mimic heartbeats, rainfall, or crashing waves can also help to send them into a stupor.

Cuddling. Every baby loves a cuddle—feeling and hearing your heartbeat up close, your warm touch, and smelling your natural scent. All will help induce sleep.

What does my newborn’s sleep look like?

From Unii’s Newborn Journey, we share what your baby’s sleep should look like.