You’ve just prepared a delicious feast, full of foods your toddler usually adores. But low and behold, once they’re sat down at the table, they refuse practically everything—saying they’re not hungry, saying they don’t like it. They even refuse their dessert! Surely, now that they’re more active, they should need more food? What on earth is going on?

Why is my child’s appetite and behaviour changing this way?

Rest assured, this behaviour is absolutely normal in a 1- to 3-year-old. Shortly after they reach their first birthday, a toddler’s growth rate slows, and all of a sudden they don’t need as much food, despite the fact that they’re more active.

Due to varying activity levels, growth rates, and metabolism, your child’s appetite will chop and change day by day. So, when your little one rejects the food you place before them, they aren’t rejecting you; they’re just behaving exactly as a toddler should, and we shouldn’t take it personally.

Now that we have an idea of what causes this change in behaviour, let’s quickly cover why it’s so important for you to actively take care of your child’s diet.

Why is it important for me to understand my child’s food needs?

For our kids to grow healthy and strong, energised, and motivated to keep on learning, they need a balanced diet full of nutritious and delicious foods. And if we, as their sole suppliers of food and drink, don’t know what they should eat, how much they need, and when they need it, it could impact their overall health and wellbeing.

So how do I make sure my toddler gets everything they need from their diet?

Firstly, when they refuse to eat their favourite veggies or eat a tonne of food in the morning and next to nothing at lunch, try not to get frustrated. Instead, remind yourself that the eating habits and schedules of toddlers are unpredictable and erratic. Unlike adults, most toddlers will balance their intake over the course of a week rather than a day.

During this picky-eating phase, forcing your child to eat will often only make things worse. What you can do is offer a selection of healthy foods with as many different tastes and consistency as possible, and then let them pick and choose. If they refuse to eat anything in the moment, save them a plate of tasty bits and pieces for later, and don’t let them fill up on cookies or sweets that offer very little nutritional value.

Don’t force them to finish their plate. When children are told how much to eat, they won’t learn to self-regulate their food intake. This means they’ll have trouble recognising when they are full, which can lead to various weight issues.

Your toddler needs a variety of foods from the same four basic nutrition groups as you:

Eggs, fish, meat, beans, and poultry (proteins)

Nuts, butters, seeds, oily fish, avocado (sources of fats)

Fruit and vegetables (offering vitamins and minerals, in particular iron and calcium sources)

Potatoes, rice, pasta, wholegrain bread, and cereals (carbohydrates)

Young toddlers should get about half of their calories from fat. However, some fats are better than others. The fats found in avocado, fish, olive oil, and dairy are good for your child. Meanwhile, the fats found in fried foods, packaged goods, and fast foods are as unhealthy for your kids as they are for you.

At this age, your little one should be able to handle most of the foods served to the rest of the family. However, they won’t enjoy heavily seasoned foods. Too much salt may be harmful to your child’s long-term health.

Test their food before they dig in to make sure it isn’t too hot, and be careful to chop any larger or smaller pieces. Children don’t learn to chew and grind their food as we do until they’re around 4 years old, so make sure to chop tomatoes and grapes, halve any large nuts and seeds, cut up carrots and meat, and so on.

Make sure to supervise your child when they are eating and encourage them to sit down. And though it will take many reminders, teach them to finish their mouthful before speaking. Not only do these steps promote good table manners, but they also keep your child safe.

It is recommended that babies continue to breastfeed in combination with the introduction of regular foods up until the age of 24 months. However, many children will continue to breastfeed on and off well into toddlerhood, and this is perfectly normal.

While it is possible to get all the necessary vitamins from fruit and vegetables, a lot of children do fall short on nutrients, and current guidance in the UK recommends taking vitamins A, C, and D until 5 years of age.

Most toddlers love their milk, but too much milk and not enough iron-rich food can lead to certain iron deficiencies. So long as they’re not drinking more than 600 mL a day and eating a varied and balanced diet, your little one will get all the iron they need.

By 18 months, a toddler should be able to use a spoon, fork, and cup all on their own. But given that tantrums are very real at this age and often involve food, it might be worth opting for plastic kitchenware—we don’t want a ceramic plate flung across the kitchen.

While they’re perfectly OK once in a while, we recommend that you keep sweets out of sight. That way, they should stay out of mind, too. If these are offered, it is best to offer them alongside the main meal and not as a 'treat' food.

Daily meal ideas:

Breakfast:

Porridge oats with milk and chia seeds
Toast with eggs and tomatoes
Plain yoghurt with fortified cereals
Fruit and nut butter

Lunch:

Tuna sweetcorn sandwich with cucumber and carrot sticks, cheese, and fruit
Jacket potato with beans, cheese, and peas
Homemade pizza with vegetables and a tomato base

Dinner:

Chicken and mushroom risotto, followed by yoghurt
Pasta with homemade vegetable tomato sauce, meatballs, and cheese
Lentil curry topped with seeds and flat bread
Couscous with salmon and roasted veggies with feta on top

Snacks:

Fruit
Yoghurt
Oatcake and cream cheese

What do I need to know about feeding my 1 to 3 year-old?

From Unii’s Toddler Nutrition Journey, we offer tips on feeding your toddler.